Meet my dream-husband:
Not David Hyde Pierce (because he's gay and I'll never meet him), but Niles Crane. No, I'm not delusional -- I know that he's not real. He's not like my super-geeky Edward Cullen or anything. No, I was watching Frasier and laughing at the highbrow jokes and admiring the adventures of this fictional family, and I had a personal revelation. I want to marry a classy, slightly neurotic man who wears a suit to work and will take me to the opera/ballet/theatre on a regular basis. I want to marry a man who knows the difference between Monet and Manet, who enjoys reading, who has a vast knowledge of both classical literature and mythology. Someone with whom I can converse and banter and be classy.
And because this is the kind of person I want to spend my life with, I've got to do everything in my power to attract these kinds of people. I've made a list of goals for myself which will, I hope, elevate and accentuate my inner Elegant Lady. Some of these goals include:
- Stop swearing
- No more t-shirts (except in the case of pajamas)
- Do my hair and make-up on a daily basis
- Bi-weekly home manicures and pedicures
- Widen my knowledge of classical music and pursue my more academic interests
- Work hard on my grades so I can get into a good graduate program
- Read, read, read!
- Work on my posture (yoga, stretches, muscle building)
- Get into shape!
- Maintain an air of tranquility
- Take time for spiritual things
- Spend a minimum of twenty minutes outdoors daily