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Friday, March 5, 2010

Day 9: Sonofagun

So, Ol' Pa's passed on. Funeral is on Tuesday, internment on Wednesday... That's really all there is to say about that.

Macbeth went really well! We almost sold out several nights, and I think that (for the most part) it was a really consistent production. I had a blast working with everyone -- Travis taught me a lot -- and I am really glad to have had the opportunity to work on such a challenging role. Frank Bryant and I are the Irene Ryan nominees from the show, and boy, are we stoked! I'm going to start ordering plays ASAP... probably with student loan money, haha.

Anyway, onto more thought-provoking stuff.

Socially, I feel like I'm in kind of an awkward place. Like, people need me to be something specific, and it's more along the lines of being a good listener than being someone who is having feelings and experiences of their own. I have a lot I'd like to talk about, a lot of personal business, but I feel like the only people I can trust with certain things are either (a) too emotionally drained because of their own lives or (b) completely disinterested.

It's kind of a difficult spot, because I've had some scary shiz happen this week. Grandpa's death, the physical manifestation of incredibly negative energy, complete vulnerability, progressing anxiety... and all in a period of five or six days. Spencer's in California with Sara (which is a shitstorm in and of itself)... and to be completely honest, I feel very alone. For the past four hours I've been sitting in my room doing crossword puzzles and listening to the Crazy Heart soundtrack.

I just want to sleep for eighty million years.

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