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Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Summer!

Yesterday was my last day of work for the semester. I hung out with Brittney and then filled out some forms, and then helped this super-nice kid named Gordon with a paper for his history class. Today I had my last final -- chemistry. It was open notes, so it really wasn't bad. I think I maybe got a B, a B+ if I'm lucky (I'm awful at figuring out charges and balancing equations, etc.). I'm done. My junior year of college is completely over.

So, summer is officially here. And, if the past three years are any indication, next week I will have two days of absolutely ridiculous productivity, and then I will crash into an abominable depression. This will probably be magnified by the fact that Spencer moves to Logan on the 15th.

At the risk of sounding totally unstable, I'm going to have serious separation anxiety. Hell, I'm having it now, and he's here for ten more days.

It kind of hit me today that he's really, actually leaving. Like, he will no longer be here. And I didn't break down or anything, but I was... seriously unsettled. I imagine it's kind of like getting a divorce. I've spent the last four years of my life with this person, on an almost daily basis. We've laughed and cried and screamed and cursed together. We've supported and undermined and tried to outdo each other. And now, to think of going to school without him...

Well, I don't like it. Not one bit.

It's inevitable, of course. My logical mind knows that. But my emotional mind is getting ready to freak the shit out.

1 comment:

  1. i cant believe its already summer, i feel like im just visiting home, and im going back home to st george again,, but im not! gah.
    i understand what you feel about sepencer leaving and your separation anxiety, i have and get the worst anxiety ever,
    but look at it this way !
    now you can come to salt lake and visit, and we can all hang out[:
    i hate the fact that people leave and move on with their lives, hahah it sucks, cuz i hate thinking about moving and leaving people and
    you get so close to some people and you dont want to lose them. but you wont, and psh in just a couple months youll be leaving too!! gosh on your mission ! ill miss you like crazy!
    can we go to like tuachan (i know i probably spelled that wrong) this summer, and have sleep overs please! ill come visit there, and you guys come up to salt lake, kk? [:
    love you lots hannah!!

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